I met Jeff's girlfriend today. It's about time, really; they've been together for...oh...just over two years now, I think. She seemed like a nice girl. She's the opposite of me in every conceivable way - she's talkative, she's optimistic, she smiles a lot. (Randomness: I'm way hotter.) I was relieved to find that this girl knows who I am, at least a little; when Jeff introduced us she said that it was nice to finally meet me. So...she's heard about me. The question is, how much has she heard?

I felt really dirty standing there with them. They were holding hands and the only thing that occured to me was, "I had my tongue in your boyfriend's mouth four years ago. It was kind of gross. He wasn't quite so fat then." I really shouldn't have felt that way - dirty, I mean - because it was a million years ago. It didn't matter much at the time and it doesn't matter at all now. Jeff and I were both unattached and recovering from being dumped by long-term significant others at the time. It was an act of desperation. It's funny now. But still...I felt dirty. It's not the sort of behavior I engage in. Ever. (Except for that one time.)

If the girlfriend knows about what Jeff refers to as "the thing that happened", did she want to kill me this afternoon? Probably - and, if so, I understand. Whenever I was in the vicinity of John Henry's Mann twin, I wanted to kill her. That situation is quite analagous to my situation with Jeff, I think...John Henry had some random action with the Mann twin (though he got quite a bit more random action than I did...) during our year apart. The really creepy thing is that John Henry had the Mann twin on the exact same night that I made my mistake with Jeffrey - maybe even at the same time. It was Prom night in Rapids and V-Ball in Eau Claire. In fact, I think that I may have engaged in a tongue-raping with Jeff because I knew that John Henry was off with the Mann twin at that precise moment. (Which, I think, is a better excuse than John Henry's "it had been a while." Boys need to stop thinking with their dicks.)

Maybe I didn't just feel dirty because I was standing next to Jeff's girlfriend. I think it's quite probable that I was also feeling dirty about not telling Mr. Henry about the Jeffrey incident. I should have told him when he told me about the Mann twin, but I didn't. I'm not sure why...maybe I wanted to remain saintly. (Well...as far as santliness was possible.) Maybe I wanted him to feel guilty. I don't know. I guess I always figured that it wasn't worth mentioning since it was so insignificant.

Sig, the dirty girl. Interesting, huh?